Saturday, September 29, 2007

The Value of Community

To me the values I cherish most reflect the community in which I live. Sadly this much needed aspect of life has diminished in recent times. Here in my street I no longer know the names of my near neighbours. Most live insular lives and perhaps I do too. When my mother moved into this suburb in the 1960s, she knew almost everyone who lived in this part of the street. They were in most part friends and would have wonderful parties in each others homes. Now people scurry indoors when anyione approaches. People worry about protecting their property and see everyone as a threat.
This is why I value community so much. Being older means I no longer have the community connections that come from having children living at home. Schools, P&C meeting, gym clubs, etc are all a wonderful way to meet people. Being in the 'aged' catagory can be very isolating in itself.
Lately I have been having trouble hearing. Instead of getting sympathetic responses, I am usually met with impatience. This morning I did not understand what my daughter was saying on the phone. After making several attempts to guess what she was saying, she responded with an "oh mother" statement. This has the effect of making me feel less than valued. I want to laugh that I mis-hear, while not stictly funny, I don't want it to be serious either. After this, I want to scream. Not hearing well is making me an outsider in my group.
One thing I love in the Age of Technology is the way I can link with like minded people all over the world, while sitting at my keyboard. I like having 'friends' in far away places. I value their wisdom, sense of place and above all their friendship.
As one gets older, one loses touch with so many people. No one replaces them and I cling to my family to try to retain my sense of self. Perth is one of the fasted growing cities in Australia. The place I grew up in is hardly recognisable to me anymore and my neighbours are likely to be of a different ethnic origin. Sometime I don't even feel Australian. Western Australia has a desert, the Nullabour Plain, separating us from the Eastern States. There they look out across the Pacific to other Rim countries like the United States and Japan. Here on the Indian Ocean, we are almost as close to Asia as we are to Sydney. It seems as though our Prime Minister often forget this too. After the Boxing Day Tsunami in 2003, he, John Howard sent a message of condolence to the Indian Ocean nations containing this remarkable statement, " I send my deepest sympathies to these countries, while we are not an Indian Ocean nation..." Where the heck does he think we are? How can the leader of the country forget about us here in the West?
Age may bring many rewards, but for me I am increasingly finding it isolating. I am no longer linked to my community by work or play. I find it hard to understand those I love and I feel devalued when I am scolded for not understanding .
So, as I mentioned earlier. I thank all my friends on the cyber highway. Those who respond to my often very silly posts. People in diverse places like Jane in the UK and Robert and Laurie in the US. These people who are linked by the power of words, lifestyles and beliefs now form my community. I shall never meet most and to me that is not as important as just knowing that they care and offer their support, friendship and love.
Thank you one and all, Jocelyn

1 comment:

Robert said...

You're a wonderful friend Jocelyn and I'm happy to have met you. The ironic thing to me is that we often share thoughts and feelings over the internet that people don't often talk about in person. So in a way we know each other better. Thanks for your support and helpful knowledge in nutritional and Buddhist matters.

Robert